Fic: Hide all tears
Oct. 28th, 2010 12:49 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
j_gabrielleTitle: Hide all tears
Pairing: broken!JongKey, Kyuhae, Kihae, ninja!OnHyun
Rating: NC-17 (to be safe)
Summary: It starts the day Kibum receives a package from Cho Kyuhyun.
A/N: In light of what has happened today, I just HAD to write something lest I combust. This is somewhat of a sequel to A dream of a reality and a reality of a dream and is written for the lovely![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
rainofteardrops who is in need of some ♥... I love you?
It's okay. It'll be okay now.
Kibum does this thing with himself; he tells himself everyday that if Jonghyun loves him, he’ll say it out loud. But Jonghyun never says, and so Kibum never bothers because he knows that whatever happens, Jonghyun is, and always will be the one he loves.
When Kyuhyun-hyung goes missing, Kibum doesn't ask questions about why Donghae-hyung looks like he's a hollow shell and why the other members are all so drawn and tired. He receives something in the mail, an exact 15 days since they announced Cho Kyuhyun's disappearance on national television, 14 days and a half since the whole world began searching, 10 days since Leeteuk broke down on a show and pleaded Kyuhyun to just call, that they weren't mad, that all they wanted was for him to come home. Come home please.
Kibum has had 3 days of understanding, 9 days of wondering. Wondering whether he would miss him. Understanding that sometimes sanity doesn't come in a clear and packaged form. He keeps the truth of Cho Kyuhyun in the same place where he keeps all the other things; in the back of his wardrobe beneath the loose floorboards with pictures and spare bits of nothing. Kibum’s not stupid. He knows the difference between reality and his own private fantasy. And he tells himself this every time he thinks that he might just follow Kyuhyun to his bridge in Paris.
He knows his handwriting well by now having read his diary back and forth more times than he can count. Kibum wonders though, as he watches the news anchor update the public on Cho Kyuhyun, why had he chosen to send this to him? This book that contained his words, contained his soul. It wasn't like they'd been particularly close before.
I see him. So clear. But I don't think I can tell which one he is.
Shin Se Kyung is beautiful. She is sweet, polite, and undeniably perfect. She is perfect the way Kibum can never be. She brings the light into Jonghyun's eyes, causes hands that used to hold his, hold hers instead. She makes him laugh, and lets them all see a side of him they've not seen in a long, long time. Shin Se Kyung is the girl that stole Jonghyun's heart, even before they'd said hello.
Jonghyun is his best mate, his confidante, his brother. They've known each other for almost a decade now, almost the length of his teenage years. They're the best, the best of anything and everything. And Kibum fucking loves him. Loves him to the point where it hurts. And he'll hold his tongue, keep his silence, hide this secret and bring it with him to his grave.
Kibum takes up smoking. It was easy both being in a profession where someone smokes at one point or another. It's easy to just take a stick and buy a pack for himself. He smokes on the rooftops, balconies and back alleyways. It's easy, to watch the smoke linger in the air, coloured by the lights. These days it's easy to forget that he lives with 4 other persons. It's too quiet, and even with the food he cooks, there will always be some dishes he throws into the bin.
I see them together and I burn with jealousy and anger. And then I see him again. And I can smile.
He takes up clubbing. He always goes in a skirt and a flowing top, wearing a wig that curls and falls down his back. The men he kisses have no idea that there is an adams apple under the black band around his throat and he leaves just before anything can progress beyond the groping. But there was one close call when one guy decides he likes it rough and slaps him hard before ripping his top. The end of this little side story is that that man might not be able to reproduce anymore when Kibum was done with him. There's a red bloom on his cheek that quickly turns black and blue and a busted lip. He hides under his covers for two days and merely mutters when Jinki asks if he's okay.
No one notices when there are female clothes in the wash.
The cigarettes lose their thrill soon enough and he's not stupid enough to dabble in drugs. Kim Kibum likes it better when he's sane and stone cold sober, thank you very much. He takes up cutting instead. Small strokes that don't break the skin, merely making it swell and heat. It sends a shiver up his spine when he discovers he can actually get away with it. He starts wearing longer sleeves and keeps a distance from others so that they won't notice, won't accidentally cause him to be discovered. It thrills him.
I don't think I can bear to leave him any longer... I miss him even when he's next to me.
He tries not to dream, knowing why Kyuhyun goes where he goes. But the temptation is strong.
Jonghyun brings her home for dinner one weekend. Kibum has made his favourite dishes when she arrives with dishes of her own. She apologises, not knowing he'd be cooking. He merely states that hers will taste better anyways. When the other crowd around her, like bees to honey, he scrapes a whole day's worth of effort into the bin. It's ok. It's not like he'd not been doing it for the past few weeks anyways. That night, right after dinner, he retreats to his own room and reads Kyuhyun's words while listening to his voice floating through his headphones.
It's okay. It's really okay.
He sees Heechul straddling a stool in this obscure place he visits after Jonghyun goes to send her home. "One for me please." He says to the bartender.
"I should stop you, you know?" The older man states with a curl to his lips. "Be a good hyung and shit.."
Kibum scoffs, nodding his thanks when the bartender brings his drink around. "If you'd wanted to be a role model hyung, you have to wait till you're born again. You're a little too old to start in this lifetime." He smiles around the the rim of his glass when Heechul chuckles. They end up too drunk and Siwon comes to pick them both up and he wakes up with a major hangover on the couch in Super Junior's dorms. He shuffles to the kitchen and Ryeowook is there throwing him a sympathetic smile and an offering of Haejangguk. He doesn't notice it when Donghae sits down next to him.
Kibum feels the urge to start throwing punches, to rip this man apart. To shake him and make him understand, that yes, you're the reason we may never find Cho Kyuhyun's body. But the impulse passes when Kibum walks in and plants a kiss on his forehead and smiles at him.
'Was this what you saw?' He quietly asks as he drinks his soup.
Leeteuk drops him off and he sees his members in the living room, all apparently worried.
"Why didn't you call?" Jinki admonishes quietly.
"You made us all worried." Minho says in that quiet voice of his.
Taemin hugs him and murmurs, "Don't do that again."
Jonghyun sits on his side of the sofa and says nothing, looking at him with unreadable emotions painting his face. Kibum wishes then that he was strong enough to make this man love him too. Wishes he had half of what it pushed Kyuhyun to make his decision. But he has nothing. so he merely smiles, ruffles the magnae's hair and apologises to his leader.
The others don't see what I see. They don't feel what I feel. I'm in love. With two who are the same. With two I must choose.
There are still many pages left in the diary, so he picks up his pen and writes where Kyuhyun leaves off. His writing may not be as beautiful as his, but it legible. And that's okay.
Shit hits the fan soon enough and Jonghyun is the one who feels the brunt of the company's wrath that he's dating too soon. Jinki feels it's his fault, the younger ones are telling him it's not. And Kibum just wants to run away. So he does.
He doesn't send a letter to Shin Se Kyung, he doesn't leave with confrontations and confessions. In fact, when he leaves Jinki is the one who sends him to the airport.
"Take care. I'll hold everyone off." He pauses. "Just come back okay?" Kibum nods, turning to enter the gate when he feels Jinki's hands clasp on his wrist. The older boy draws him into a hug. "You're not the only who loves him, Kibum." He whispers into the his ear. Kibum doesn't look back when he walks away.
He tries to see what Kyuhyun sees, tries to capture the things that captivated him. What little French he knows brings him to the bridge where there's a small offerings of flowers at the middle of the bridge. He asks around and finds out that there was a man, not too long ago, who'd fallen off the bridge. Some have said that he wasn't alone and that he'd been holding the hand of another man when they'd jumped. Kibum goes back there everyday he's in Paris.
Kibum,
You're reading this. So this is yours. This book. I'm mailing two things today, and this is one of it. You might never know why I sent this to you, but I hope you'll just take it as it is; a gift from a hyung. Throw it away, burn it, give it to one of my members, I can't care what you do with it. It's yours.
I'm tired, Kibum. Very tired. I'm tired of pretending I don't love him, tired of wanting to. In this reality at least. I love him. In the other reality. You might never get it, but that's okay. I don't think anyone will ever do. I'm not crazy despite what some of my members might tell you. But I can't live in this reality. Not when all I feel is pain. Not when I know this is merely the dream of a dream.
I love Lee Donghae. I love him then, now and always. I love him in this reality and the other. I love him the way you love Jonghyun. I know you do, I've seen how you look at him. Nothing good will come from it, Kibum. But I know that you, like me, are in too deep to care whether we hurt ourselves or someone else in our love. Kibum, even if it kills you, if you want to stay in this reality you'll need to forget him. Forget love, forget your heart.
I'll be going to Paris, because that's where we always are. Because that's where I'll be going to meet him.
The other reality is calling me and I have made my decision Kibum. I chose my reality. And this isn't it. I'll be waking up from my dream. How will you wake?
Kyuhyun
Kibum has read this letter more times than he could count. It came with the leather bound journal that held Cho Kyuhyun's final writings. He doesn't fully understand half of what the man had wrote when he'd first received it, doesn't really now. And he keeps it for reasons unknown; there was just something about a secret you know that the others don't.
He smooths his hands over the cold stone of the ledge. Even until now, he doesn't think Kyuhyun was crazy. How could love be crazy? The pages of the journal fluttered in the wind. The moment is broken by the ringing of his phone.
"You..."
"Hello Jonghyun." He greets curtly.
"Why didn't you tell me you were leaving?" A pause. "When are you coming back?" He doesn't particularly sound upset.
Kibum doesn't answer, but merely studies the Eiffel out in the distance. Return? What was there to return to? "I don't know... There's still much to see."
"I miss you." Jonghyun says suddenly. "I-I know I haven't been the best friend anyone could hope for, but I miss you." He laughs, and Kibum can just imagine his eyes crinkling in amusement. "You were always there, and when you weren't it just kinda felt... weird."
Kibum is trying his damn hardest not to cry. He pushes the phone to his chest, wiping furiously at his tears. "You never know what you got till it's gone." He whispers, proud that his voice doesn't break. "You have her now..."
"But she's not you..." Jonghyun states. Kibum wishes it weren't this hard.
"Yeah... Yeah. She's not me. But she is better than me." Kibum looks at the journal laid in front of him, placing a hand over it. "She provides better company than me I'm sure. I only bitch at you." He states with tired mirth tinting his words.
"She's not you."
"I know. I'm the one and only fucking Almighty Key. You can't be me." Kibum relishes in the warm laughter that comes through to him. Sighing, he watches the wind take the cloud of his breath away.
Jonghyun says quietly, "I love you Kim Kibum." And really, he doesn't have anything to say to that.
Kibum has this thing he does; he waits till Jonghyun says he loves him and he does, Kibum will tell him that he loves him too. But when Jonghyun finally says that he loves him, Kibum merely says, "But you love her." Jonghyun doesn't understand, and that's ok. Because he is never meant to understand.
Cho Kyuhyun chose, and it's his turn. He looks up to the heavens, climbing on the ledge. "We could grow old together, have lifetimes together." He whispers, watching the Seine run beneath him. "You chose your reality." He holds out the journal. "I choose mine." And lets go.
A/N: I'm just... Coping. Don't mind me. *sniffles*
Pairing: broken!JongKey, Kyuhae, Kihae, ninja!OnHyun
Rating: NC-17 (to be safe)
Summary: It starts the day Kibum receives a package from Cho Kyuhyun.
A/N: In light of what has happened today, I just HAD to write something lest I combust. This is somewhat of a sequel to A dream of a reality and a reality of a dream and is written for the lovely
rainofteardrops who is in need of some ♥... I love you?It's okay. It'll be okay now.
Kibum does this thing with himself; he tells himself everyday that if Jonghyun loves him, he’ll say it out loud. But Jonghyun never says, and so Kibum never bothers because he knows that whatever happens, Jonghyun is, and always will be the one he loves.
When Kyuhyun-hyung goes missing, Kibum doesn't ask questions about why Donghae-hyung looks like he's a hollow shell and why the other members are all so drawn and tired. He receives something in the mail, an exact 15 days since they announced Cho Kyuhyun's disappearance on national television, 14 days and a half since the whole world began searching, 10 days since Leeteuk broke down on a show and pleaded Kyuhyun to just call, that they weren't mad, that all they wanted was for him to come home. Come home please.
Kibum has had 3 days of understanding, 9 days of wondering. Wondering whether he would miss him. Understanding that sometimes sanity doesn't come in a clear and packaged form. He keeps the truth of Cho Kyuhyun in the same place where he keeps all the other things; in the back of his wardrobe beneath the loose floorboards with pictures and spare bits of nothing. Kibum’s not stupid. He knows the difference between reality and his own private fantasy. And he tells himself this every time he thinks that he might just follow Kyuhyun to his bridge in Paris.
He knows his handwriting well by now having read his diary back and forth more times than he can count. Kibum wonders though, as he watches the news anchor update the public on Cho Kyuhyun, why had he chosen to send this to him? This book that contained his words, contained his soul. It wasn't like they'd been particularly close before.
I see him. So clear. But I don't think I can tell which one he is.
Shin Se Kyung is beautiful. She is sweet, polite, and undeniably perfect. She is perfect the way Kibum can never be. She brings the light into Jonghyun's eyes, causes hands that used to hold his, hold hers instead. She makes him laugh, and lets them all see a side of him they've not seen in a long, long time. Shin Se Kyung is the girl that stole Jonghyun's heart, even before they'd said hello.
Jonghyun is his best mate, his confidante, his brother. They've known each other for almost a decade now, almost the length of his teenage years. They're the best, the best of anything and everything. And Kibum fucking loves him. Loves him to the point where it hurts. And he'll hold his tongue, keep his silence, hide this secret and bring it with him to his grave.
Kibum takes up smoking. It was easy both being in a profession where someone smokes at one point or another. It's easy to just take a stick and buy a pack for himself. He smokes on the rooftops, balconies and back alleyways. It's easy, to watch the smoke linger in the air, coloured by the lights. These days it's easy to forget that he lives with 4 other persons. It's too quiet, and even with the food he cooks, there will always be some dishes he throws into the bin.
I see them together and I burn with jealousy and anger. And then I see him again. And I can smile.
He takes up clubbing. He always goes in a skirt and a flowing top, wearing a wig that curls and falls down his back. The men he kisses have no idea that there is an adams apple under the black band around his throat and he leaves just before anything can progress beyond the groping. But there was one close call when one guy decides he likes it rough and slaps him hard before ripping his top. The end of this little side story is that that man might not be able to reproduce anymore when Kibum was done with him. There's a red bloom on his cheek that quickly turns black and blue and a busted lip. He hides under his covers for two days and merely mutters when Jinki asks if he's okay.
No one notices when there are female clothes in the wash.
The cigarettes lose their thrill soon enough and he's not stupid enough to dabble in drugs. Kim Kibum likes it better when he's sane and stone cold sober, thank you very much. He takes up cutting instead. Small strokes that don't break the skin, merely making it swell and heat. It sends a shiver up his spine when he discovers he can actually get away with it. He starts wearing longer sleeves and keeps a distance from others so that they won't notice, won't accidentally cause him to be discovered. It thrills him.
I don't think I can bear to leave him any longer... I miss him even when he's next to me.
He tries not to dream, knowing why Kyuhyun goes where he goes. But the temptation is strong.
Jonghyun brings her home for dinner one weekend. Kibum has made his favourite dishes when she arrives with dishes of her own. She apologises, not knowing he'd be cooking. He merely states that hers will taste better anyways. When the other crowd around her, like bees to honey, he scrapes a whole day's worth of effort into the bin. It's ok. It's not like he'd not been doing it for the past few weeks anyways. That night, right after dinner, he retreats to his own room and reads Kyuhyun's words while listening to his voice floating through his headphones.
It's okay. It's really okay.
He sees Heechul straddling a stool in this obscure place he visits after Jonghyun goes to send her home. "One for me please." He says to the bartender.
"I should stop you, you know?" The older man states with a curl to his lips. "Be a good hyung and shit.."
Kibum scoffs, nodding his thanks when the bartender brings his drink around. "If you'd wanted to be a role model hyung, you have to wait till you're born again. You're a little too old to start in this lifetime." He smiles around the the rim of his glass when Heechul chuckles. They end up too drunk and Siwon comes to pick them both up and he wakes up with a major hangover on the couch in Super Junior's dorms. He shuffles to the kitchen and Ryeowook is there throwing him a sympathetic smile and an offering of Haejangguk. He doesn't notice it when Donghae sits down next to him.
Kibum feels the urge to start throwing punches, to rip this man apart. To shake him and make him understand, that yes, you're the reason we may never find Cho Kyuhyun's body. But the impulse passes when Kibum walks in and plants a kiss on his forehead and smiles at him.
'Was this what you saw?' He quietly asks as he drinks his soup.
Leeteuk drops him off and he sees his members in the living room, all apparently worried.
"Why didn't you call?" Jinki admonishes quietly.
"You made us all worried." Minho says in that quiet voice of his.
Taemin hugs him and murmurs, "Don't do that again."
Jonghyun sits on his side of the sofa and says nothing, looking at him with unreadable emotions painting his face. Kibum wishes then that he was strong enough to make this man love him too. Wishes he had half of what it pushed Kyuhyun to make his decision. But he has nothing. so he merely smiles, ruffles the magnae's hair and apologises to his leader.
The others don't see what I see. They don't feel what I feel. I'm in love. With two who are the same. With two I must choose.
There are still many pages left in the diary, so he picks up his pen and writes where Kyuhyun leaves off. His writing may not be as beautiful as his, but it legible. And that's okay.
Shit hits the fan soon enough and Jonghyun is the one who feels the brunt of the company's wrath that he's dating too soon. Jinki feels it's his fault, the younger ones are telling him it's not. And Kibum just wants to run away. So he does.
He doesn't send a letter to Shin Se Kyung, he doesn't leave with confrontations and confessions. In fact, when he leaves Jinki is the one who sends him to the airport.
"Take care. I'll hold everyone off." He pauses. "Just come back okay?" Kibum nods, turning to enter the gate when he feels Jinki's hands clasp on his wrist. The older boy draws him into a hug. "You're not the only who loves him, Kibum." He whispers into the his ear. Kibum doesn't look back when he walks away.
He tries to see what Kyuhyun sees, tries to capture the things that captivated him. What little French he knows brings him to the bridge where there's a small offerings of flowers at the middle of the bridge. He asks around and finds out that there was a man, not too long ago, who'd fallen off the bridge. Some have said that he wasn't alone and that he'd been holding the hand of another man when they'd jumped. Kibum goes back there everyday he's in Paris.
Kibum,
You're reading this. So this is yours. This book. I'm mailing two things today, and this is one of it. You might never know why I sent this to you, but I hope you'll just take it as it is; a gift from a hyung. Throw it away, burn it, give it to one of my members, I can't care what you do with it. It's yours.
I'm tired, Kibum. Very tired. I'm tired of pretending I don't love him, tired of wanting to. In this reality at least. I love him. In the other reality. You might never get it, but that's okay. I don't think anyone will ever do. I'm not crazy despite what some of my members might tell you. But I can't live in this reality. Not when all I feel is pain. Not when I know this is merely the dream of a dream.
I love Lee Donghae. I love him then, now and always. I love him in this reality and the other. I love him the way you love Jonghyun. I know you do, I've seen how you look at him. Nothing good will come from it, Kibum. But I know that you, like me, are in too deep to care whether we hurt ourselves or someone else in our love. Kibum, even if it kills you, if you want to stay in this reality you'll need to forget him. Forget love, forget your heart.
I'll be going to Paris, because that's where we always are. Because that's where I'll be going to meet him.
The other reality is calling me and I have made my decision Kibum. I chose my reality. And this isn't it. I'll be waking up from my dream. How will you wake?
Kyuhyun
Kibum has read this letter more times than he could count. It came with the leather bound journal that held Cho Kyuhyun's final writings. He doesn't fully understand half of what the man had wrote when he'd first received it, doesn't really now. And he keeps it for reasons unknown; there was just something about a secret you know that the others don't.
He smooths his hands over the cold stone of the ledge. Even until now, he doesn't think Kyuhyun was crazy. How could love be crazy? The pages of the journal fluttered in the wind. The moment is broken by the ringing of his phone.
"You..."
"Hello Jonghyun." He greets curtly.
"Why didn't you tell me you were leaving?" A pause. "When are you coming back?" He doesn't particularly sound upset.
Kibum doesn't answer, but merely studies the Eiffel out in the distance. Return? What was there to return to? "I don't know... There's still much to see."
"I miss you." Jonghyun says suddenly. "I-I know I haven't been the best friend anyone could hope for, but I miss you." He laughs, and Kibum can just imagine his eyes crinkling in amusement. "You were always there, and when you weren't it just kinda felt... weird."
Kibum is trying his damn hardest not to cry. He pushes the phone to his chest, wiping furiously at his tears. "You never know what you got till it's gone." He whispers, proud that his voice doesn't break. "You have her now..."
"But she's not you..." Jonghyun states. Kibum wishes it weren't this hard.
"Yeah... Yeah. She's not me. But she is better than me." Kibum looks at the journal laid in front of him, placing a hand over it. "She provides better company than me I'm sure. I only bitch at you." He states with tired mirth tinting his words.
"She's not you."
"I know. I'm the one and only fucking Almighty Key. You can't be me." Kibum relishes in the warm laughter that comes through to him. Sighing, he watches the wind take the cloud of his breath away.
Jonghyun says quietly, "I love you Kim Kibum." And really, he doesn't have anything to say to that.
Kibum has this thing he does; he waits till Jonghyun says he loves him and he does, Kibum will tell him that he loves him too. But when Jonghyun finally says that he loves him, Kibum merely says, "But you love her." Jonghyun doesn't understand, and that's ok. Because he is never meant to understand.
Cho Kyuhyun chose, and it's his turn. He looks up to the heavens, climbing on the ledge. "We could grow old together, have lifetimes together." He whispers, watching the Seine run beneath him. "You chose your reality." He holds out the journal. "I choose mine." And lets go.
A/N: I'm just... Coping. Don't mind me. *sniffles*
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2010-10-27 05:13 pm (UTC)will read tomorrow after school <3
...i need to sleep now T^T
no subject
Date: 2010-10-27 09:16 pm (UTC)And as much as I love it, it broke my heart a bit. (poor Kyuhyun)
So wonderfully sad... I just can't express myself (and since i'm not native speaker of english, it's even harder)
I don't really understand who's the guy Kyu jumped with but I really appreciated what you wrote.
I'm seriously amazed!!
And since I live in Paris, I'll be scared of bridges now, and it's all your fault lol!!
Anyway, just THANK YOU for writing this!!
=3
no subject
Date: 2010-10-28 02:48 am (UTC)It's okay... English is sorta my second language as well, so you got a friend here ;)Take your time, use words that you feel comfortable with ^^
You live in Paris?? Can I come stay with you? *puppy dog eyes* Hahaha... Just don't look over the ledge and all will be fine.
You sometimes when someone commits suicide there are always rumours of how they did it? So, the one about Kyu jumping with another guy is somewhat like a rumour. I hope that clears up your confusion somewhat?
Thank you for commenting on this fic :D
no subject
Date: 2010-10-28 09:57 am (UTC)I'm glad you didn't mentioned any special bridge name!! Since I'm Kyu biased I would have avoid it for the rest of my life!!
Oh I totally get it now. And you're right, parisians are master in overdoing things, especially went it comes to hot topics!!
=3
no subject
Date: 2010-10-28 10:21 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-10-28 10:28 am (UTC)Where are U from?
*gotta go to college ><"*
no subject
Date: 2010-10-28 11:14 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-10-29 01:40 pm (UTC)Waooo Malaysia... I wish I could travel to all those asian countries I'm attracted to!!
I'm finally in week-end... tomorrow, I'm going to an enormous event in Paris dedicated to chocolate... can't wait!!
=3
no subject
Date: 2010-10-29 02:40 pm (UTC)You wish you could visit all the Asian countries you're attracted to, I wish I could go to Europe... Guess we're in the same boat then.
Mmm... Chocolate :9 I like the sound of that....
no subject
Date: 2010-10-29 04:30 pm (UTC)I just went to Japan so far, but my friends and I are planning Korean for... in 2 or 3 years... (next summer will be U.S and Spain...)
It's so fascinating visiting other countries and meeting people with different cultures...
*will probably make sweet chocolaty dreams tomorrow...*
no subject
Date: 2010-10-29 04:37 pm (UTC)phwoar... Japan?? Always wanted to go there. Wait for me yeah? I'm saving up to go on 2013. 13. Get it?
*slinks into your dreams*
no subject
Date: 2010-10-29 07:06 pm (UTC)Yeah, i went the first 3 weeks of august with my best friend. It has always been our dream since we were child so we spent all our savings to make our dream come true and, it definitely was a dream...
Oh 2013 would more awesome just for that!! (even if I like Mi and Henry too)
I'll try to read another story of yours this week end if I have time because, I really liked your style!!!
=3
no subject
Date: 2010-10-29 07:16 pm (UTC)2013, 2015 if anything else fails, I'll definitely meet you there ^^
Oh! I'm flattered that you like it, really. I think I'm a little to morbid for my own good... Can I add you? As a friend I mean. hahaha... totally random, I know...
no subject
Date: 2010-10-29 07:34 pm (UTC)Well, the topics might been dark but it's really easy to read, even for me how is not found of dark things.
Especially with your other OS I've read so far, I've got the feeling that your writing style can make dark things be a bit lighter...so it become wonderful. (because too sad is really too much sometimes)!!
Of course you can add me. I'd be glad to!! (Even if my lj is empty since everything I write is in french...)
no subject
Date: 2010-10-30 03:19 am (UTC)/blushes
/hugglesglomps you
Thanks for that really nice comment ^^ I tend to gravitate towards morbid subjects for some reason. But this is the first time someone tells me that my writing style makes dark things a bit lighter. So yeah... Thanks! Hehehe... I just added you...
no subject
Date: 2010-11-01 12:28 pm (UTC)It seems I've finally found my words to explain what I've felt reading this... *took long!!*
Since I've time, I think I'm gonna read your Siwon/Onew because the pairing has catch my attention... and i'm sure it'll be great!!
=3
no subject
Date: 2010-11-01 12:37 pm (UTC)kekeke... I hope you enjoy what you read ^^ Ooo... I see you added me... I've added you already right??
/is confused
hahaha... Anyhoo... You got any particular OTP?
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Date: 2010-11-01 01:55 pm (UTC)Yeah you did add me.
OTP.... hum... I've never thought about it... and I think that a good story can make a good pairing but not the opposite *what is she talking about??*
(but I guess that since I'm Kyu biased, I think that I usually like any Kyu pairing (but KyuWook) like KyuMin, KyuMi, KyuTeuk, HanKyu or KyuHae...) or maybe any unusual pairing or crossover...
Or OnKey (because the one I've read were really good) or...
Well, as you can see, I really don't know lol!!
*has now her brain overflowing from possible OTP...*
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Date: 2010-11-04 11:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-10-27 09:47 pm (UTC)But this was really beautiful. I didn't really understand Kyuhyun's part (because I didn't want to read the prequel and spoil Inception for myself) but you can really feel Kibum's inner turmoil here. ;A; So sad! But good job.
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Date: 2010-10-28 02:56 am (UTC)Jjong isn't even my bias and he had me going T__T My sis was the one who'd bawled her eyes out. Yeah... She's got enough tears for the both of us.
Hahaha... Thank you so much for reading and commenting... ♥
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Date: 2010-10-27 09:56 pm (UTC)oh its so sad. its just...just so emotional and Key and Kyu and its so amazing.
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Date: 2010-10-28 03:38 am (UTC)It's tough times, but we'll all get through it. Somehow... *wipes your tears*
Thank you for reading and commenting ♥
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Date: 2010-10-28 04:39 am (UTC)But, when Key got on the ledge, did he jump or just let go of the journal? If he jumped, we need to distroy that bridge! No more of our boys should die on that thing! XD
I'm happy for Jonghyun, I'm not bashing Se Kyung like others, but if she breaks his heart, me and a few of my friends are going after her with tortches and pitch forks ^^
Any way, loved this! :)
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Date: 2010-10-28 04:48 am (UTC)Again, like the other one, it's up to your own interpretation. Did Key jump? Or did he just let go of the journal? It's really up to you... ;)
Like you, I'm happy that Jjong found someone he wants to be with. He's not really my bias, but I still find it somehow or rather kinda sad. My sister is crying enough tears for the both of us. Right now I can only pray and hope that this won't be a situation like Lennon-Ono...
Thanks for reading and commenting ♥
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Date: 2010-10-28 05:21 am (UTC)I'm gonna saaaaay....he let go of the journal, makes for a happier ending XD
Jjong isn't really my bias either (in SHINee world, its Taemin! XD) But I'm still happy (yet kinda sadend)that he is with her. I just hope she doesn't go through hell. Fan girls can be pretty damn scary when they find out their idols are in a relationship, you know?
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Date: 2010-10-28 05:38 am (UTC)I have to agree with that...
Again it's up to you to interpret, but yeah. I like that idea. That Kibum lives on and doesn't go batshit crazy like Kyu... kekeke...
/starts packing the Molotov
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Date: 2010-10-28 05:51 am (UTC)But yeah, all hell WOULD break lose. I give them props for coming out and saying they are together. I would be terrified if I were them
*shudders*
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Date: 2010-10-28 10:25 am (UTC)I'll feel a *wee* bit of resentment to the
bitchgirl that steals Jinki's heart. Just a wee bit.I think they're both freaking out, if not already...
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Date: 2010-10-28 10:38 am (UTC)I'm sure they are
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Date: 2010-10-28 09:19 am (UTC)T_T I feel so much for Kibum. Why does this have to happen..
this is well written. i love it.
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Date: 2010-10-28 10:26 am (UTC)Thank you for reading and commenting ^^ ♥
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Date: 2010-10-28 10:38 am (UTC)But the sudden influx of angsty Key fics is depressing. :( It's like the sun being covered by clouds.
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Date: 2010-10-28 11:16 am (UTC)I'm sure the fandom will go back to normal as soon as people realise that this is freaking fan fiction and that we are fanficcers.
/huggles
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Date: 2010-10-28 10:18 pm (UTC)This story is -of course- less confusing since Key hasn't dabbled in the dream world yet, merely fighting it. Its interesting to read on how he copes and how Kyu is actually helping him somewhat though I think Key is a little afraid of Kyu for it. Brilliant work.
Remember how I said that maybe you should consider making this concept a series of one shots? Well I just thought that you could use Kyu's diary as a link. I mean, he started this, Key wrote some in the same diary, so why not continue the cycle? ..or maybe I'm just still bitter about Kyu.
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Date: 2010-10-29 02:47 pm (UTC)You are giving me ideas... *watches plot bunnies hop around for a bit* I like... I actually intended this one to be independent of its prequel but somehow or rather, it ended up going the same way, so that's that...
Kyu is someone I, personally, think has a side of him that many have yet to see. And I mean in real life. You don't go through a near death experience without changing in many ways than one. The idea of this concept being used as a series of one-shots is something I had been toying with in the beginning when I'd first started writing this, but we'll see about it. If it does happen, it'll be something that I post as I write as opposed to something that I constantly update on a regular basis.
:D Thanks for reading and commenting and I LOVE LOVE LOVE your icon and your username.
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Date: 2011-01-28 08:45 pm (UTC)Poor sweet baby!
SSK is just a beard. Let's keep telling our delusional selves that, shall we? (On the other hand, it frees up all sorts of lovely OnKey, doesn't it?)
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Date: 2011-01-29 07:41 am (UTC)Oh totally! SSK is a total beard and the real bed partner is the almighty Key himself. ;D But I agree. The amount of OnKey induced by this is phenomenal.